Does 'love heri despite heri ' make any sense? Is loving someone despite the very person ever possible? Somehow, it is the way I do, the way I've alway been functioning. I just didn't realize that. But I'm not sure about the nature of this mechanism, whether it is innate to me or just a learned way because of my frustrating with the impossibility to cross the barriers? Either way, I may have to accept it, which means I have to make that distinction in order not to misplace the unnecessary negative feeling on what is not in fact responsible. Why do things have to be complicated with me? I guess I just have to be. (Fortunately, now I've gathered some voices which when one thing is pulling away from me remind me of looking into a place where the road keeps spreading.)
